Get Smart review

OK, call me a sucker but I love The Rock. The first movie that he is listed under his own name is Get Smart and that is the movie that I went to see on Sunday evening (well it was more like afternoon as it started at 17:00, but I digress).  My incredible bias towards anything that involves Dwayne Johnson tends to overpower my otherwise rational mind (I paid too see Doom in cinema for fuck’s sake!) but even I was confused whether this was a comedy or an action film. Just as there is in my mind a positive bias towards The Rock, there is a negative one towards Steve Carell (and towards his friend Will Ferrell for that matter). I have nothing against him in more serene or dramatic roles but his overacting in the comedies is just distracting. Therefore the movie in question is not particularly funny, while the action is not over-the-top enough to be a great action film. It tries to be True Lies but with extra comedy and comes up short. (The Rock is still probably the greatest thing in it.) Some of the set pieces are nice but lack the “wow” factor, while it is very hard for me to accept Anne Hathaway going one-on-one with The Great Khali. Overall this film feels underdeveloped and over-reliant on Carell. Which is a bummer as there is a fun movie hidden somewhere inside.

On a separate note, I would like to mention an interview with Robert Downy Jr. in which he states his opinion of The Dark Knight.

I’m BAAAAAAACK!

Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned… It’s been over quite some time since my last confession/blog…

Is what I would have said if I:

1. Were a Christian (this did sound utterly Catholic)
2. did consider my not-blogging a sin (mind you, I sin plenty in other areas, but it still does not warrant a conversion )

Ok, let’s go over a few things that I’ve experienced over the last few months. Football-wise nothing good happened (with the exception of Zenit winning the UEFA cup). Job-wise…. well… considering that I am at work right now writing this…. it is probably not that satisfying. I bought a car – a 2005 Hyundai Elantra. It’s not much and the fuel consumption is horrible (or is it just my driving?) but it’s a car.

Now, to the three rants that I have:

1. Can people please stop praising “The Dark Knight”?! For fuck’s sake, it is not the greatest movie ever made! Stop giving it extra stars just because Heath Ledger is dead! He was a good actor and this was a good performance, but there is a limit how much of an influence this should be! The first Nolan Batmanwas praised for being focused on the Batman rather than the villains.  In this one it is the opposite – Batman is kind of an afterthought, but this is apparently a better movie according to the same critics. What a load of bollocks! I did like the second film a bit more than the first one (the editing was much less nauseating) but I did not really enjoy either of them.
2. I was on holiday in France for a few days and I found myself in FNAC in Nice city centre reading manga in French. Not only are there more title published in French than in English, there are some titles that even the scanlators haven’t gotten to. Also, unlike their American counterparts, the French publishers actually acquire the rights to some adult manga and not just shounen stuff. Why the fuck is that? I know the the French have this entire culture in regard to what they call BD that publishes quite a lot of works for the adults, but surely such audience can be found in the English-speaking countries as well?! Have the Americans ever heard of the “product diversification”? Morons.
3. I am tired of constantly being screwed on prices of electronics.  I’ve been wanting to buy a MacBook Pro or an iMac for quite some time now, but the prices in Israel are twice of what they are in the US. This summer I also decided to buy a DSLR (I was thinking of Nikon D80). In the US with the lens that I want it would cost me less than $1400. In Nice It was closer to EUR1600 while in Israel the price is app. $1900. If there is a chance (I know there isn’t but still) that somebody from the aforementioned companies who has some influence over worldwide prices is reading this I just want to say one thing: Stop being such a useless cunt and help us poor consumers! Tell you fuckin’ distributors to stop ripping us off!!!

Anyway… I am back and I will rant and vent and probably whine more in the future.

Dreams and Nightmares

I must apologize that there have been no new posts, but nothing has been happening in my life to write about. My life is such a routine at the moment that nothing exciting ever happens.

Something did happen last night though… I had the weirdest dream/nightmare I’ve had in ages last night. Mind you, I do not get that many nightmares nowadays. I do get weird-ass anxiety attacks caused by the stupidest reasons ever (the normally relate to my passions) and cannot fall asleep, but after I do fall asleep it’s all over.

Last night was different. I had a dream about some sort of plague-infested zombie rats that kept crawling all over me while I was at the top of some really tall bell tower (I am kinda afraid of heights). These friggin’ rats were scaring the shit out of me as I was afraid that they would bite me. At the same time my youngest nephew (he is three and a half now) was sitting somewhere at the middle level of the tower playing with the damn things. I woke up tree or four times but everytime I would close my eyes the rats were back. And so was the sweat the feeling that they were crawling all over me.

I had to wake up and go sit in front of the PC for 20 minutes before going back to sleep to purge that stupid idea from my subconscious. Anyone has any idea what that stupid dream could have meant?

Russia

I’ve written this in a message to a friend in Russia, when she asked me my honest opinion. This post is a copy of what I wrote (and iot is in Russian, as I cannot be bothered to translate). My Russian friends – feel free to rip me a new one if you disagree or feel offended by me.

Меня в России бесит безумного много, но в первую очередь это политика и общество:

1. Политическая система в России не существует. Какая на хрен демократия? Какой к чёртовой матери выбор? В какой цивилизованной стране нынче глава государства может Назвать своего преемника без каких-либо прав это делать? А Путин выбрал себе цесаревича и все похлопали. Всем абсолютно побоку что происходит в стране пока у них дома всё в порядке. Так называемый средний класс в России на столько замкнут на своих личных проблем, что всем начхать что происходит вокруг. Будучи на свадьбе в России я рассказал застолом про абсолютно лживый репортаж про Израиль. Но как бы меня не бесили сфальсифицированные репортажи на Первом канале, абсолютная апатия людей за столом меня внутри поразила до глубины души. Во всём мире средний класс это лицо страны. В России это не так.

2. Я абсолютно необъективен, но на мой взгляд национализм в России идёт сейчас рука об руку с едва прикрытым антисемитизмом а расизмом. Я смотрел на том же Первом перед Новым Годом как это ничтожество Максим Галкин “шутил” по поводу “кавказских” братьев Меладзе. И все в зале смеялись над его пошлостями, в то же время когда все певцы готовы этим-же Меладзе ноги целовать лишь бы они написали для них новую песню. Н о все готовы смеяться над расистскими шутками.

3. Непереносимый шовинизм. Я уверен что ты с этим уже сталкивалась и не раз. Если хочешь, могу и тут поподробнее.

4. Ненависть ко всему что люди не могут понять. Как например гомосексуализм. (Помни, я либерал, хотя по английски я скорее libertarian). Если кому-то это не нравится, на здоровье! Но корчить рожи и говорить “пускай это лучше останется за границей”, это кретинизм. Какое их дело? Кто им дал право судить в кого человек влюблён?

5. Неизвестно откуда взявшаяся (очень часто напускная) набожность. Если человек во что-то верит, это замечательно! Но если человек заявляет на весь свет, что он/а православный/ая, а потом не может мне объяснить мне концепцию Троици, я считаю, что он самый обычный притворщик.

И всё таки главное для меня, это апатия. Когда люди понимают что им врут, что их обманывают, что на них всё так же наживаются, но поскольку у ни нормальный заработок, они сидят и молчат в тряпочку. Когда им в очередной раз переписывают историю (что Сталин не был психическим монстром или какие славные у нас всегда были чекисты) а они сидят и говорят ” а кто его знает как там было на самом деле”…

Я не хочу сказать , что на Западе всё прекрасно. Спору нет, там своего дерьма хватает. Но там это дерьмо хотя бы пытаются вычистить, а не претворяются что его нет.

Fuckin drivers!

A friend of mine wrote yesterday about drivers in Korea.

I tend to complain about drivers in Israel (due to my somewhat misogynistic nature – especially the female ones). However….

FUCK! ASS! CUNT! WANKING BOLLOCKS STUFFED UP THE RECTUM OF A SODDEN BABOON!

I never expected to be hit by a moron going backwards near my own house!

50 meters after I left the house, in the middle of a road (that is a slow village road, mind you…) I see a guy stopping to let someone reverse onto the road . Being a relaxed driver I stop over 2 meters behind him. All of a sudden the brainless monkey (male) behind the wheel starts to reverse as well (presumably to give more space to the guy in front of him).  But instead of just going back at a normal pace he decides to push down the gas pedal.

I have seen many morons on the road. Hell, I fell asleep last summer and slammed into a guy at a traffic light! But being hit by an idiot going full throttle  in reverse just outside my home is fuckin’ ridiculous!

Happy New Year!

It took me three days to write this. But as I was (quite rightly) accused of being extremely irregular for a blogger, I had to write something!

So I wanted to write something witty and funny and may be put a photo of a nice Christmas tree (ёлка) that I am growing in my yard…. but then I got distracted and too tired from my most recent attempt at fitness to even try anything.

Therefore, all I can say is:

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL OF YOU, YOU CRAZY ASS CUNTS!

 I wish you all the best: money health, entertainment, women/men etc. etc. etc.

Happiness and lack thereof…

Let me start by saying that all the comments are welcome and all will be approved even if you say that I sound utterly pathetic. (But be advised that if this is the first time you comment, or if you change your details form you previous comment I will have to approve you, so you might have to wait before your comment appears on the site.)

On my facebook profile I have written that I am “disappointed at how long it’s been since I felt really happy… (Cheesy but true)”. And then a facebook friend of mine has asked me how long it has been since I felt happy. Being a blogger I told her that I would answer that question here in this blog. I am however slightly perplexed by my inability to actually write down a structured reply. It seems that I cannot think of a correct answer, so please forgive me if the following paragraphs appear to be disjointed ramblings of a manic depressive.

Let’s start with my claim that I have four passions in my life – Arsenal, TV/Cinema, Food and Women. It would hence seem that the combination of these would create some sort of happiness for me.

I am not going to deny that Arsenal managed to provide some happy moments in my life, but ultimately those moments never managed to last as being a team that I support with all my heart they never fail to disappoint me whenever everything else is going fine (see last blog entry).

Given my very close association with at least one of the Seven Deadly Sins (Gluttony), it could be said that I enjoy good food. However it does make me content not happy. No matter how much I like okonomiyaki or a good juicy steak they do not actually make me happy.

Lets move on to the next passion – Cinema/TV (and by extension Anime and by extension from that – Manga). Which brings me to a sad realisation that this one particular ‘passion’ is nothing more that plain old escapism. Sure, I get excited reading a cool manga or watching a good movie/episode, but that is just me running away from the reality and enjoying an imaginary world that someone else has created. It is kinda sad that each and every week I wait for Tuesday to get my portion of TV and later in the week anime/manga. Can escapism make you happy? At the moment it doesn’t seem that way. It sure, at least temporary, stops me from being unhappy… but anything above that? Does not seem to be the case.

And last but not the least – Women. Even if I am a romantic that believes in the sanctity of marriage, I do not have the slightest idea if any woman has ever made me happy. Don’t get me wrong, sexual escapades are great and on the purely physical side not many things can beat a good orgasm, but is that real happiness? This might have something to do with the fact that I haven’t been in love in over ten years, but  women don’t make me happy either nowadays.

So does this mean that the last time I was happy was in 1997-98 (when I was in fact very much in love, Arsenal won the Double, and I was yet to discover the joy of TV series and/or anime/manga)? Has it really been ten years? Am I really that sad of a person?

And taking that into consideration, does this now mean that I need to fall in love at the moment when Arsenal win the Champions League , while there is an abundance of great stuff on the small and big screens? What are the chances of that happening?

When was the last time YOU were happy? What caused it? Am I just a lonely unemployed blogger with too much time on my hands?

When we are shit we really are shit…

An astonishingly lazy and uninspired performance from Arsenal today saw them lose their first game of the season. And with all due respect to Arsene Wenger, he must not use the 4 away games in a row as an excuse. And to not blame it on the absence of the four players that have been at the heart of Arsenal this season (Flamini, Fabregas, Hleb, van Persie – my favourite players on OleOle.com) is also stupid. I know he doesn’t want to say to the players like Gilberto, Diarra, Eduardo and the pathetic Eboue (I am starting to hate his nastiness and diving more and more each day) cannot do the job, but that is the fuckin’ truth!!! Gilberto is just too rusty and together with Diarra they have exactly ZERO creativity between them at the moment. Eduardo just cannot seem to play for Arsenal the way he plays for Croatia.

Since the last two of the four injured (Flamini and Hleb) had to leave the field due to injury during the Aston Villa game, to say that Arsenal have struggled is an understatement which I cannot make with a clean conscience: the fact that the Villa game was won was down to pure luck, the draw against Newcastle that followed was a fair result (Adebayor did have a fleeting moment of brilliance there), and now these games have culminated in a loss against a team that was third from bottom before the game. Fuck!

Next game (after CL) is at home against the Chukchas. I really hope that at least two of the injured players come back: the rest of the team just does not have the spirit without them (and that for the first time this season includes Gallas and Toure who seem to have lost all of their confidence lately).

Ricky Gervais – Fame

I am a big fan of Ricky Gervais and I really like his first attempt at stand-up – Animals. It was slightly sophisticated with enough swearing to keep me happy. The second one – Politics – was very well categorised by my friend Iggy who said that there were far too many gay jokes and not enough about politics. So I was very glad to see that Gervais didn’t stop there and has now produced another show – Fame

The only major drawback of the new show is that it requires you to know the modern British celebrities (whether real stars like French and Saunders, or utterly annoying useless cunts like Jade Goody). If you are like me and thus a fan of the British telly, you should be fine. (If not, go and buy some French and Saunders DVDs.)

Overall there are plenty of racial (not racist, mind you) jokes as well as a few animal-related (read bestiality) jokes. I think this is an improvement on the second Live show and you should check it out. You do not have to buy it, but check it out.

Scanlating and IRC

There is something that has been bugging me for a while now (since the moment I got into reading manga all over again).

Why are so many scanlating groups using IRC as the main distribution channel. It seems to be the case especially for the new releases. Now, don’t get me wrong, I really appreciate everything these people do but why IRC? I know that this trend started some time over 10 years ago as it was the easiest way for the fans to exchange information; but since then there have appeared other means of distribution. DC++, torrents and even the basic forums with links to sites like rapidshare are much easier to access than IRC which is often confusing and extremely unfriendly towards beginners. In addition to that, I do not comprehend the reason for limiting yourself to IRC: it does not provide the users with extra privacy or even with extra camaraderie – the leechers happily go on the IRC channel, get what they want and leave. Hence this is what I am asking: why IRC? Is it the cost of the servers? But neither torrents nor DC++ really require the use of servers. I know there are plenty of great groups that give IRC as just an extra option but at the same time there are quite a few great groups that stick with IRC and IRC only. I am just trying to understand the reasoning for this.

Any ideas?